Innergiggler's Blog


Posted on: June 21, 2010

Dad, I spent my life resenting you because…you favored Mitchell and had a negative attitude toward women in general. 

Your favoritism toward my brother was so obvious that it was painful; your overview of women had a deleterious effect on me which required huge therapeutic commitments.  

I always thought you hated me and I talked about you behind your back to my girlfriends, giving details of your bowel experiences and other personal crap.  I never took the time to look at some of the loving things you did. I’d like to do that now:

  1. When I entered my senior year in high school, you called me aside and told me you’d pay for any college I chose.  I found that strange because you were always “bellyaching” about money. 

       2.   Long after you were gone, Mom told me about that dayyou both drove me up to college.  She said after you dropped me off at the dorm, the two of you headed to the nearest gas station and cried your eyes out.  Dad, you cried…over me?   Yes I was kind of young, 16, but I believe you would have cried even if I were 20.

    3.   Our last conversation…being one of very few phone chats…ever…when you told me you’d also suffered from panic attacks just the way I had…OMG not only did that humanize you, but just knowing you understood what I had been feeling was so huge.

   4.   You and Mom listened to my WNBC radio show over the 1-800 lines without fail.  When I did a mock interview with you one night on the air…it slipped out that you “were so prou…” okay you stopped…but I still have that cassette dad and I knew what you were going to say.

   5.   And Dad, thank you for being a hard worker, a brilliant salesman and a shrewd biz owner.  Stashing that “bellyaching money”really worked in my favor…you’re all gone…but you’re still taking care of your little girl.

I LOVE YOU DAD…Belated Father’s Day!



i love you more now.
so so so so wow.


Absolutely beautiful!!
How wonderful to realize, to admit, to love back.

I want to hear WNBC radio shows. I keep asking friends I will find someone who taped them. I am on a mission.

I’ve got many of the shows…probably a couple hundred hours…

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