Innergiggler's Blog

THE FEAR OF TRUTH

Posted on: March 29, 2011

Facing our own truth is usually a daunting and uncomfortable experience.  People prefer watching what they perceive as “truth” in others – i.e.  reality TV – even though there’s barely any reality in these shows.  Rather the “players” are manipulated by producers and directors for the purpose of entertainment.  Who wants to look in the mirror?  Really.  Okay, unless you’ve just lost 20 lbs.

I’m not interested in or compelled by any of the “housewives” silliness, most talk shows, make-over or celebrity’s lives behind the scenes – although I guiltily have given some time to the Kardashians.  Uninvolved, empty, lonely evenings can do that.  Watching the sisters interact often triggered  jealously within me – yes – and I became drenched with envy over their innate “sisterness”  – the self-contained sorority of blood that stays with them through eternity.  I’ve always wanted a sister – begged mom as dad hauled her big belly off to the hospital – “Please mom, please bring home a little sister for me to play with…please.”   Now a good look in that mirror.

Disappointment with the boy child ended soon after he arrived and for about 20 years.   Unfortunately sibling rivalry was accidentally encouraged by parents who knew nothing about child-rearing – so there were always “issues” between he and I.  We were taught “he” was the pretty/ or good-looking one and “I” was the smart one.  He never realized he was smart and I never felt pretty until later on in life.

The rivalry eventually re-ignited when bro married “the loving but clueless woman.”  Both she and her “ilk” would have been an enormous snooze fest of a reality show.  Father works hard to support his four-piece family, mother shops, father works harder, mother shops with more verve, father increases drug and alcohol usage, mother is lost in space between Nordstrom racks – eventually the brother body is totally ravaged by cancer dies, he passes away… and she continues shopping. 

I’ll never know why but from the beginning she disliked me – and you can see how I respectfully I viewed her.  Perhaps fortunately I was left out of their lives.  Resentment?  Yes.  Truth?  Was I the perfect sister-in-law?  No.  I did some crappy things.  The mirror is telling me I’m imperfect.

 This blog is about truth!

The truth is there are many events in my past which are eclipsing my Inner Giggler – my mission here is to unleash them with some dignity and humor and to encourage you to do the same.

Time to work on The Inner Giggler Radio Show which airs Sundays @7p pst/ 10p est.  The call in number to listen or talk is 661- 449-1449.  The computer link for listening is

http://BlogTalkRadio.com/InnerGiggler

 

 

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5 Responses to "THE FEAR OF TRUTH"

I think all parents although they would never admit it are more connected to one kid than another. I do not think love comes into play it is just some vibe between the two. I think kids feel the same with parents, they love both but feel more connected to one more than the other. I had a sister, she passed away two years ago from cancer. She was only three years younger than me but I cannot recall when we ever did anything together. She was never happy nor was anything good enough for her. We never fought or not talked but we did not share like I share with you or some of the other goddesses. I am sorry for the loss of your brother and feel bad that ms mall never knew how good she had it. But you my dear are loving and supportive and if you are seeing imperfect fine for we all are. Your truth and mine just told. xoxo

Truth helps us wake up and smell the roses. It is in every family. But I think I love both my kids with the same love but in different way. I don’t either one would think of the other as the favorite. They both thought as kids I like the other better so I knew I was doing it right. An equal opportunity offender. 🙂

I applaud your truth. It helps other people share their own. Makes us feel we’re all in this dizzying, unpredictable rollercoaster together. xo

TRUTH…this time in our lives is about TRUTH…telling it, living it, gathering it and teaching it. with truth, shame and fear are shown the proverbial door

Truth has been the best path for me. Sure I have paid the price for telling it like it is just like others have paid for lies, or tales not that I have not had my share of them also. The Truth will set you free. It is so true. Fly light like a butterfly and enjoy life.

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