Innergiggler's Blog

Posts Tagged ‘Glory Land

Wednesday morning I awoke in Glory Land.                             

My eyes opened and something felt painlessly different.  Usually I want to close my lids quickly and do the usual “oh no, another day” moan which leads to pulling the covers over my head and doing a head flop back onto my pillow.

I didn’t recognize the positive vibe at first because I’d been living in CaCa Land for over a month.  So I looked under the bed, beneath the pillow, then ventured into the bathroom for a sign.  Everything looked the same – but – something felt different…there was something glowing inside of me – it was…ME!  I was shimmering from the inside out.

After being slam-bam, no thank you ma’am by a “friend” gone rogue – I was feeling worthless, in despair, heart-broken, and ready to jump!  Life didn’t seem worth living – when you love someone, think you’re caring for and supporting him/her and then they turn around and whack you in the face with a frying pan because they’ve been building up resentments for a very long time – that hurts.  And I couldn’t let go of it.  Real friends – two I barely knew – listened quietly to my verbal tears, held me, told me they’d be there for me – before and after I repaired.

I didn’t think the pain would ever subside.  I didn’t think I deserved happiness.  I could barely write, barely show up for my life, my husband, my friends.  It’s that horrible “P” word – process.  It processed itself out of my heart, through my bowels.

I don’t expect to stay in Glory Land forever.  It’s just a break from “life as usual” giving me the opportunity to breathe freely in between the next challenge.  I wanna say “bring it on” but I’d be lying.   Glory Land is where I need to be for today – please come join me!